Ranting, Raving, and Rocking by Sal Canzonieri

This was my fifth column in AMP magazine. This one Rants on the need for a centrist third party, Raves on myspace.com (it was new then!), and Rocks on about sleaze rock bands like Spread Eagle, Crank County Daredevils, Amps II Eleven, and Broken Teeth!

Loud Fast Rules magazine issue 1
AMP magazine
(July 2005 issue #35)
Column #5

Welcome to my fifth column for AMP magazine.

This month’s Rant:

Isn't time for a REAL third party, a true balanced Centrist party? By Centrist, I mean pragmatic. What the average level- headed person wants: just enough government to:
1.) Keep things running efficiently and effectively so that our economy prospers,
2.) regulated just enough so that we don't die by the hand of negligent crooks, and
3.) people who aren't crooks being left alone to live as they choose to.

What we have today, at this turn of the century, is a fat bloated stagnate cesspool of boring, selfish, professional politicians, who are totally alienated from regular people. Both the Democrats and the Republicans have turned into parodies of themselves and each other. They are two sides of the same coin. The Far Right, the Far Left, what's the difference? They both don't want you to be happy, they both want to control not only what you do, but what you think. Both are insane mind-control police that would rather everyone die (but not them) just to prove a pointless point. The extremists of the far left wing liberals and the far right wing conservatives have caused a definitive hatred among the American people towards one another. It is apparent that if this continues that the erosion of democracy would be next logical step followed by chaos then a dictatorial police state. We truly are a nation divided as is apparent in our presidential elections (one won the vote, the other won the electoral). Neither party speaks for the people who pay the most taxes in our country. The people who's fruits of their hard work has been collected and is being flushed down the toilet in that "war" called Iraq. The people whose kids will face the full brunt of this gigantic deficit spending with a semi-permanently stagnated economy, high interest payments, high fuel prices, constant threat of terrorism with America and the world a more dangerous place, with the majority of this future nation "just making it" in the near future.

BOTH the Democrats and the Republicans are to blame for our nation's current state of zombieness (where most people just don't give a shit anymore about anything). The Republicans for letting their party be usurped by the Mayflower Mafia robber barons families and the Democrats for being the weak out of touch losers they proved themselves to be this past election season. Neither party has really anything to say, no vision, no wisdom, no sense of direction, and no leadership. Neither party speaks to us. They just take. The Republicans stab you in the belly and the Democrats stab you in the back. I, and millions like me in America, didn't work like hell to make ends meet and pay taxes for the past 30 years to have the great surplus our elbow grease created by the late 1990s all go to what!? Where did that surplus go? To pay for Iraq? For BILLIONS of our sweat and blood soaked EARNED dollars going to pay for a giant waste of time and money, a place where we weren't asked to go there to "help" and a place that in the long run hates us and will one day be our enemies in the coming World War III against the Moslems? Fuck that! A place were our young men and women soldiers are being picked off one by one just because some cowboy president wants to one up his Dad so that he can show him who much of a real man he is and not only that but a better man than him cause he "won" a "war" that his father didn't (one that cost his Dad a re-election).
We need a Centrist party because there is no more representation for us in the government. Our day to day life is no longer important to people who are out of touch with the common man. What's the big issues that our illustrious Congress have been debating about so far this year: Stem Cell research; whether the plug should be pulled for that poor Florida woman, and whether filibusters should be allowed or not. Wow, BIG FUCKING DEAL! I'm soooo glad that our tax dollars are at work dealing with these super-important issues!

Fuck that! Way to focus on the unimportant issues. You wanna stay away from important things like health care and economy as much as possible, it would be too messy. Why aren't they figuring out how we can get OUT of being dependent on Fossil fuels, especially since there is only 100 years of oil left to be used! Why aren't they dealing with the fact that China is building up their military arsenal, their nuclear weapons, their troop strength, so that they can one day kick our ass just when we are too drained and looking the other way. Why aren't they really dealing with the issue that we have new enemies, the Moslem fundamentalist nation, and the world will no longer be secure in one's daily life unless things change? Why aren't they working on how our youth will be educated so that they will be able to even have a job in the near future that won't be outsourced overseas! Why aren't they doing something about government fraud, waste and abuse and how well they will guard our federal moneys against pork? This year alone there were 10,656 projects in 13 appropriations bills totaling more than 22.9 billion dollars. Does anyone in Congress really give a damn about us? They are too busy making sure tons of pork is being tacked onto every new bill being proposed, so that their "pals" will get what they lobbied for. Lobbying! If there ever was a joke, it is lobbying, which is essentially legalized BRIBING, it is influencing the decisions of the decision makers, when these decision makers should be deciding what's best for the PEOPLE that live in America. Ted Bridis, AP writer put out an article last year detailing why a request for the Justice Department's Foreign Lobby database could not be turned over to the press under the Freedom of Information Act. The reason? Thomas J. McIntyre claims: "Implementing such a request risks a crash that cannot be fixed and could result in a major loss of data, which would be devastating". The FILE IS TOO HUGE! And, that's just the Foreign lobbyists! Imagine all the domestic ones! The time has come to find the middle ground and elect representatives that will do what is best for the nation as a whole not just special interests or lobbyists or corporations. It is supposed to be "WE THE PEOPLE" not "We the Politicians" or "We the Democrats" or "We the Republicans". We need elected people that are willing to kick ass and roll over the dead weight in Congress.

This months Rave:

I have to say that I have to rave about www.myspace.com at least once this lifetime. Officially, Myspace (or MySpace) is a free service that uses the Internet for online communication through an interactive network of photos, weblogs, user profiles, e-mail, web forums, groups, as well as many other communication devices. This all-inclusive service is sometimes called a social networking interface. It is an active site always updating or creating new features for their members. Great! What that all means is that you can communicate with everyone and everyone's friends, and everyone's friend's friends, etc., and thus reaches thousands of people that are already interested in what you have to say or they wouldn't be there in the first place. Many bands are saying that they have gotten so many new fans from setting up a band profile at Myspace.com. AND, most importantly, and I have experienced this with my own band, Electric Frankenstein, LOTS of new people coming to your live shows! Which is very cool in today's day and age! Bands from Queens of the Stone Age to the most obscure local band are all on there, making contact with people who actually want to be contacted from them, no junk mail!

There are tons of girls at Myspace, which attracts tons of guys, which attracts lots of bands, which attracts lots of fans, and everyday this network grows exponentially! You can post bulletin to your network, you can solicit for more friends (people who are part of your network), you can post comments, send email, check out blogs, and post concert dates, and lots more. Someone this site really took off in popularity, being at the right place at the right time. Most people in the networks communicate with each other now via Myspace.com mostly, instead of sending emails from their email service. People meet each other there and date, people get lots of new friends who are also into what you are into, and so on. Try it, you'll like it! Just be smart and don't reveal too much personal information about you (address/phone/school/etc), especially if you are a young kid! Not too safe!

What's Rocking:

Hey, if you are into Sleaze Rock, then there are some cool bands that you can check out! WHAT IS SLEAZE ROCK? Sleaze rock is the bastard child of heavy metal, music that is rebellious, aggressive and downright nasty! The Black Oak Arkansas bands of today, long haired, tattooed, tight boots, black leather and denim clad, biker boots, and motorcycles!

1. The Crank County Daredevils - a righteous heavy blast of heavy rock! Described as the most sleaziest, raunchiest and most rockin' Hollywood-style street-metal band from Asheville, North Carolina. Their songs are raw enough for the Punk Rock n Rollers to get into and well crafted enough for fans of heavy street rock to love as well. Lots of fun for the leather and denim crowd that wants a fast-living and hard-rocking band to crank up the High Energy Rock n Roll to drink beer by. They are starting to get lots of great press, half cause of their killer Rock n Roll looks and half cause of their killer Rock n Roll music. Their website says they are "Dressed in Nikki Sixx hand-me-downs and drooling with a demonic appetite for sex, drugs and rock-n-roll, the loud-and-lewd Crank County Daredevils owe their filthy souls to the gutter-glam sounds of Motley Crue, Guns 'N Roses, W.A.S.P. and Backyard Babies." Sounds great to me!
Check them out at: http://www.crankcountydaredevils.com where you can buy their new CD: Kings of Sleaze

2. Broken Teeth - If you love bloody-knuckle, rawk 'n' roll that will bust your chops with all the bottle-smashing bravado of barroom bad-asses like AC/DC and Rose Tattoo, then this is the band for you! Hailing from Austin, Texas, Broken Teeth is comprised of former members of Dangerous Toys, Dirty Looks and Pariah. These guys released their self-titled first album in 1999 and just made their new one. Pure three chord mid tempo hard rock that Bon Scott himself would have approved of. Only non-trendy Texas would have begotten a band like this!
Check them out at: http://www.brokenteeth.com where you can buy their new CD: Guilty Pleasure

3. Spread Eagle - Don't think just the USA has dibs on raunchy Rawk, Vancouver Canada is home to Spread Eagle, a really juicy Punk Rock n Roll band along the lines of Grand Funk Railroad meets the Sex Pistols! They have been described as Kick-ass sleazy devil-fueled rock 'n' roll by their fans.
Check them out at: http://www.spreadeagle.ca where you can buy their new self-titled CD.

4. Amps II Eleven - This super fuzzed out Rawk Punk band is one of the best new bands coming out of Cleveland Ohio in a long time! More music for heavy drinking and heavy Bar BQing! Ripping roaring fuzzed out super muscle rock with a nice dose of Punk Rock irony and attitude, these long haired write wall of guitar power blasts that are great to drive to. Their website says that their music reaffirms the Midwest's grip on real, dirt-beneath-the-fingernails rock and roll. Can't argue with that! Check them out at: http://www.amps2eleven.com where you can buy their new self- titled CD.

Don't forget other Raunch Rawk N Roll bands that I have mentioned in past columns: Ironhead, Ironboss, On Parole, and Drag Citizen! By the way, all these bands will be featured soon on Volume 13 of the "A Fistful of Rock n Roll" compilation series, which will be a 3 cd set - Part 1 will be free inside Carbon 14 magazine and Parts 2 & 3 will be a 2-cd set on Steel Cage Records!


That's it for this issue! Click here to read column #6

Sal Canzonieri - www.electricfrankenstein.com / www.myspace.com/electricfrankenstein

(c) 2005 BGT ENT / Sal Canzonieri